You Aren't Fat Until Someone Asks You If You're Pregnant

The title of this entry may seem kind of odd. It may seem vague. It's almost as if I'm leading you to a point. Yes I am. The point is this, self-ignorance is bliss. I just celebrated my 30th birthday and as soon as the clock struck midnight on September 7th, the shit hit the fan. Last Wednesday I went to the mall. My co-workers got me a gift certificate to Foot Locker so I went a little buckw wild all over the mall. I made my way to Foot Locker and talked to the guys in the store. I was looking for some kicks, shirts, jackets, basically whatever I could get my hands on. For some odd reason we got on the subject of my age. O I remember. People feel it is their inalieble right to challenge me on my knowledge of things. Here's an example.

Exhibit A: Whenever and I mean WHENEVER I go to a club, and I decide to dance there is always someone there to challenge me.
See photo below. (This is not staged. I was in Las Vegas, and this guy would not stop trying to battle me. I feel like I am living in the movie West Side Story sometimes)



Back to my age.

I made a remark to the guy about rap. Something old, I don't remember exactly what it was. But he says "What do you know about that? You're too young to know about that!"

I roll eyes and think to myself: "Okay buddy, let's do this dance"

A: "How old do you think I am"
Foot Locker Dude: "I own no. Like 22?"
A: *raises thumb in the air"
Foot Locker Dude 2: "24!"
A: *raises thumb in the air"
Foot Locker Dude 1: "What? Like 29?"
A: "I'm 30 God damnit! I'm 30"
Foot Locker Dudes: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Foot Locker Dude 1: "You don't look like you're 30. Comin' in here talkin' about hip hop and wearing Jordans and shit."
A: "Well I am God damnit. Peace! I'm out!"

Here's my point. You don't know something is wrong with you until someone points it out. For instance, when I was a kid and I had a zit, my dad would ALWAYS point it out . I never thought it was bad until he would go "MAN AGE! That bump on your face is HUGE!"

Basically, I didn't realize that being single at 30 was a big deal, until I logged into my facebook account this morning and saw this shit...



I think Facebook is ran by mother-in-laws, gynecoligists, and old women from New York City and the writers of Sex and The City. This shit is so depressing it's unbelievable. I mean it's one thing to see trailers for stupid movies, get pop ups for porn sites, or clicking on bouncing Obama heads. But this this self-esteem shattering nonsense is ridiculous. Can't I see something else while I'm FB stalking guys besides a reminder that I'm single, 30 and FB stalking?? Is that so difficult to ask?

I will keep you posted as to what other ads the Facebook gshtapo throws at me.